Childcare After Divorce
Divorce is not an easy decision to reach for any couple, and when there are children involved it can be even more difficult. Hiring a babysitter can be a challenging task but an important one as it can be key in making this transition as stress-free for the children as possible.
A babysitter can provide much-needed stability in their lives during this turbulent time. The right babysitter can also help communicate to the parents the effects the divorce may be having on the children.
Trying to reach a mutual agreement about who should care for your children can be difficult. What happens if both parents disagree? How do you approach awkward rules that are now in place due to divorce? We are here to help, here are some tips to make the transition easier.
The child should come first
You must be willing to compromise, try to put your differences aside where possible and concentrate on the child. What kind of babysitter will suit your new life, and are they capable of supporting the children through this tough transitional period? Give your children enough information to prepare them for the upcoming changes in their lives. Answer their questions as truthfully as possible but remember they do not need to know all of the reasons behind the divorce.
Create a schedule
What type of babysitter do you need? Are you both on similar working schedules, should you employ a full-time babysitter? Or do you need a part-time babysitter for after work hours? These are important questions to ask, maybe your partner would rather spend extra time with your child rather than hiring a babysitter. It is also good to discuss who takes care of the child in the unlikely event the babysitter cancels, and have a rota planned out to avoid disagreements. When possible, minimize unpredictable schedules, transitions, or abrupt separations.
Hiring a babysitter
How do you find a babysitter that is suitable for your new family dynamic? Babysits can be extremely helpful in these situations. Our goal is to empower parents and the babysitting community globally. We believe in a future that incites easier solutions for everyday life. When hiring a babysitter during/after a divorce, it is a good idea to choose the same babysitter for both parents as it can be difficult for a child to have two homes and multiple babysitters. Having one babysitter between both homes provides a child with more stability, which in turn will help them in this new transition.
Discuss your needs
It is a good idea to discuss what you both need in terms of a babysitter. One might prefer a younger babysitter that can be creative and play with the children. The other may prefer an older babysitter with years of experience. It is a good idea for both parents to shortlist several babysitters each and try to come to a mutual agreement about one. This can help avoid major disagreements. Some children like spending half their time with each parent, others seem to prefer the stability of having one home and having visits with the other parent. Some parents choose to remain in the same home, but this only works in the rarest of circumstances. This is why one shared babysitter is best as too much change can be overwhelming for the child. Both parents should work to keep routines and discipline the same in both households. Similar expectations about bedtimes, rules, and homework will reduce anxiety, especially in younger children.
How much will you pay your babysitter? This is also a topic that needs to be discussed between parents. Both parents must come up with a fee that suits both of their budgets. It can be an awkward topic to approach, but if you are having difficulty you can also check out the average price of a babysitter to help you both come to an agreement.
It is a good idea to explain the circumstances to your babysitter. Let them know if it has been a difficult time for your children. Give them advice on what to say if the children ask difficult questions regarding their parents’ divorce. Ask them to provide feedback if they notice signs that their child is struggling due to the recent divorce. Behavioral changes are important to watch out for, any new or changing signs of moodiness; sadness; anxiety; school problems; or difficulties with friends, appetite, and sleep can be signs of a problem.
All in all, the most important advice is to put your children first. Both parents only want what is best for their children. It can be challenging to find the perfect fit, but hopefully, with the help of Babysits along with these tips, you will both find a babysitter who is perfect for your family. You can also use Babysits to find a nanny if you're looking for extra help during this period.